Time for the Derby!

On May 4 (and every first Saturday in May) we have the running of the Kentucky Derby. This year is the 139th instance of this...horse race. I've never really cared about horse racing. I don't even love horses that much. But it is definitely on my bucket list to attend the Derby, because I don't think the race is really much about the race. It's all about the drinking. In case you haven't noticed, I like drinking.

Watching the Kentucky Derby is not like watching the Super Bowl. Sit down to catch the NFL championship, and it's an all-day affair of cheering for a team that is not yours and, for some, watching commercials. Well, the Derby lasts about as long as two of those cute Budweiser Clydesdale ads. Horses line up, horses go. Two minutes later, it's all over.

So, if you are going to make it a whole afternoon party, there are really only two ways to do it: Drinking and gambling. I understand the crowd on the ground in Churchill Downs treats it in much the same way.

So, to make it a good Derby day, follow the six easy steps listed below, in no particular order:

1. Construct yourself a ridiculously overdone hat. Get a normal hat and keep adding weirdness to it until it can be seen from space. Handkerchiefs, tulle, scale models of horses, feathers, sparklers, whatever. Wear it to the party.
2. Make people dress nicely. Having your loser friends hang out in t-shirts and flip-flops is definitely not in the spirit of the day. This is a dignified event, and proper respect should be shown. If you need a dress code, "Colonel Sanders semi-formal" works. Encourage linen suits.
3. Make it a game. Have guests pick horses to win, place and show. Familiarize yourself with terms like trifeca, perfecta and superfecta. Gather money at the door and create a payout system based on best results. Someone scoring a (unlikely) superfecta should get an ungodly share of the loot, while someone who just picks the winner should get a respectable sum. Remember, picking the winner is going to be hard enough: None of the guests are going to know one iota about horse racing, and all wagers will be based on superstition and the pre-race coverage.
4. Have some food. Though the traditional dish is a stew made of various meats and veg called burgoo, any lovely finger food is good. Stay away from messy stuff like wings, as your guests will be wearing nice clothes, and will all be pretending to be civilized.
5. Have some food. Yeah, I said it again. That's because it is crucial. This is not a beer-swilling casual event. This is a dignified undertaking, and so people will be drinking lots of dignified beverages made of straight alcohol with no mixers. If people aren't able to buffer their drinks with food, everyone will be plastered before the race starts. While this may be cool for the amusement factor of a lot of well-dressed people wearing silly hats stumbling around, it's not really proper to get good and hammered until after the race.
6. Drink mint juleps. Really, you have no choice. Mint juleps are the Derby. They've been consumed there for over 100 years, first in silver cups, then in souvenir glassware. Respect the tradition. I'm not saying you should kick someone out who insists on quaffing a Bud Light, but you should definitely direct some very stern and disapproving glances their way.

But, as important as the last one is, there's a big problem: It can be damned difficult to make a  proper julep. Either you get too much alcohol, not enough alcohol, too sweet, not sweet enough, not enough mint, etc. It can be maddening. And during the party is not the time to be experimenting with unsuccessful juleps. After all, you do want people to be tipsy enough that you can slip in and make the appropriate bets for the superfecta pot, because you have been studying the horses and their jockeys for the past month. You have been studying, haven't you?

Lucky for you, Geoffrey Wilson from Loa in New Orleans is here to help. While not a traditional mint julep, his "Fairgrounds Julep" is more complex, more balanced and just tastes better. It also will knock you on your ass if you don't follow steps 4 and 5 above.

Fairgrounds Julep
1oz Rittenhouse Rye
1oz Pierre Ferrand Cognac
1/2oz Smith & Cross Jamaican rum 
1/2oz simple syrup
Dash of Angostura bitters
A bunch of fresh mint

In a Collins-style glass (you can probably use a normal drinking glass if you don't have one), muddle 10-12 mint leaves. Take a muddler and push and twist on the mint in the bottom of the glass like four times, just to release the oils. Then fill the glass with crushed ice.

Add to the glass the rye, Cognac, simple syrup and bitters. Grab a bar spoon and stir until well incorporated, and you've got the mint all mixed in. Add some more crushed ice.

Grab your Smith & Cross and consider floating it on top. I actually prefer it mixed in, but I'll let you decide. Garnish with a sprig of mint.

Note: You can't just substitute any old rum if you don't have the Smith & Cross. S&C has more of a rhum agricole taste which, if you are not used to it, is very weird-tastic

Another note: When I said these would knock you on your ass, I was not kidding. You have 2 1/2oz of alcohol here, with no mixer, which goes down easy. The components? Rye: 100 proof. Cognac: 80 proof. Rum: A punishing 114 proof. Consider yourself warned.

Horse note: For this year's Derby, keep an eye out for Rosie Napravni, the only female jockey in the race, riding Mylute.

Rittenhouse Rye
Product of USA
$22 at Applejack

Pierre Ferrand Cognac Ambre
Product of France
$46 at Applejack

Smith & Cross Traditional Jamaica Rum
Product of Jamaica and UK
$31 at Total Beverage

A Brave Bull...

...is much better with sotol. I tried it, as mentioned in the last post, and the sotol does not drown out the Kahlua, but it also counteracts some sweetness of the liqueur. I still wouldn't sit around and sip some, but as a shooter? Most definitely.

Brave Bull
1oz Sotol
1/2oz Kahlua
Stir it, shoot it

Scotland is the land of Scotch...

...and the Islay area may be the best of them all. Definitely produces the peatiest drams. And local bartender/bar owner extraordinaire Sean Kenyon is there this week. Like him on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/seankenyon13 or follow him on Twitter @seankenyon. He's posting pics as he moves across the country, so catch cool snaps of awesome distilleries! Or, if you can't, just try to stop into his speakeasy, Williams & Graham.

One of these things...

...is not like the other. Here we have some plants.

They look pretty much the same as far as I can tell. Both spiky, both hanging out in some dirt. They remind me most of the yucca plants that my friends and I would steer clear of when sneaking around around empty lots in elementary school.

And, all three -- yucca (not shown), agave (top) and Desert Spoon (bottom) -- are of the same family. But while everyone is familiar with the agave, specifically blue agave, and what comes from it, we might not know about what comes out of the Spoon, which is the subject of this post.

Over the past ten years or so, tequila has become something you don't have to be ashamed of drinking. Everyone I have ever met has a tequila story, usually involving excessive consumption in either high school or college, and a general swearing-off of the drink. Strangely, even with all these pledges of avoidance, tequila sales have been going gangbusters.

I attribute much of the increase to the release of mild plata (silver) tequilas, such as Don Julio and Patron, mixed into a sickly sweet margarita. These go down easy and taste not so much like tequila but as a alcoholic enhancer like vodka in mixed drinks. But there is an increasing population that appreciates tequila on its own merits, and goes out of the their way to track down flavorful and varied varieties of tequila. It's treated, in some circles, the way Scotch or bourbon is. If you've ever seen a coin margarita on the menu, this is a good way to transition from a Patron margarita to the joy that is the world of more complex tequilas.

But an interesting side effect of this increased attention is insight into some of the other brands of spirits produced in Mexico. First came mescal, with its almost overpowering smoky flavor and, despite all assumptions of those who have not tried a good one, no worm (or whatever the hell that thing is) in the bottom of the bottle. And now, we have the output of the aforementioned Desert Spoon: Sotol.

Produced in the northern state of Chihuahua, sotol is created in much the same way as tequila. And in tasting them, there is a family resemblance, which becomes more pronounced when you mix them with other stuff. You could make a perfectly serviceable margarita with the stuff. In fact, you could use it as a replacement for any drink which has tequila in it. (It might even make a Brave Bull -- tequila mixed with Kahlua -- vaguely tolerable. Actually, no; nothing could make that vile stuff something you would want to put in your mouth hole).

But consumed straight is when sotol comes into its own. Let's do a comparo between tequila and sotol. On the left, we have a bottle of Gran Imperio Herradura Reposado (we'll have a subsequent post all about tequila itself, with varied tastings). On the right, Hacienda de Chihuahua Sotol.

The Herradura is, IMHO, one of the best tequilas out there. It's so smooth and beautiful I could sit down and drinking a tumbler of the stuff straight. (Don't get excited, though; you'll never find this stuff. I haven't seen it in the US, or even many places online in Europe. I got my bottle at the Herradura distillery in Amatitan outside of the town of Tequila.) It has a creamy flavor. It tastes like Blue Agave looks, distinctly vegetal and grassy. It has a slight alcohol burn in the aftertaste. Its like tequila with all the evil wrung out of it. If you're in the neighborhood, stop in and we can do a taste test. If you haven't liked tequila before, or have sworn off it, this stuff may sway you.

The sotol, by contrast, is way floral. It has a very vague sense of smoke, like a mescal. A Scotch comparison may be Highland:Islay = Sotol:Mescal. There's also something, something almost medicinal. I pawed through my medicine cabinet to see if anything caught my wind that reminded me of the flavor, but no dice. There is something there, though.

I've found that even with extending swishing around in my mouth, I couldn't get overwhelmed with alcohol burn. In fact, the more I drank, the less like tequila it seemed. The floral taste is...happy making. I can see it as an aperitif. I can see people who don't like tequila liking this very much.

Another great reason to like sotol? Because of the lack of hype, and indeed knowledge, sotol is cheap. A bottle of sotol reposado will run you $10 cheaper than a, in my opinion, worse bottle of Patron Silver for a 750ml. Or, at nominal prices, Patron is 50% more.

So, try to pick up some if you at all enjoy tequila but a looking for a different experience. Hacienda de Chihuahua is the only sotol I have seen locally, but I expect the market to grow.

Hacienda de Chihuahua Reposado Sotol
Product of Mexico, USDA Organic
$22 at Applejack

Gran Imperio Herradura Reposado
Product of Mexico
$??? at...Yeah, right

After a very long delay, the Alcomohol blog is returning. Watch this space for updates in the next couple of days.

In the meantime, Alcomohol blurbs can always be found via Twitter @Necros44 or hashtag #alcomohol.

(BTW, that's some Oban 14-year Scotch whisky, a delightful, slightly sweet, very slightly smoky Scotch from the Highland region, at Corridor 44, on Larimer Square, Denver.)